Phuza Thursday

12 March 2009

17h39 - Put on pyjamas and bright pink flip floppy slippers.

17h49 - Get in to GreenMachine.

18h00 - Arrive at Jax, say hi to baby and puppies.

18h01 - First glass of boxed wine for the evening.

19h07 - Fourth glass of boxed wine for the evening.

21h13 - [insert number here] glass of boxed wine for the evening.

22h02 - Venture out to GreenMachine, stumble, hold onto picket fence.

22h17 - Manage to get key into ignition.

22h23 - See flashing lights up ahead, just outside of Masiphumelele. (Ass)ume it is a cow in the
road (Logical assumption based on the fact that I live in the count(ry).

22h24 - Realise it's a roadblock

22h24 - Panic

22h25 - Policeman knocks on my window.

22h25 - Press the wrong electric window button, and open up the passenger window.

22h26 - Realise my mistake.

22h26 - Open up the correct window...my window.

22h27 - "Good evening lady, please pull over and show the cop your drivers license."
Nod effectively. Pull over.

22h28 - Fumble ineffectively in bag, feeling for the said license. [Torch in face].

22h34 - Grab what feels like said license, and hand it to the officer. Card catches the light of the
torch and appears to be bright blue. Grab said card back from cop, realising it is a
library card.

22h38 - Drivers license eventually located in the mayhem that is Dom(ass)'s bag.

22h40 - Cop wishes me well on my journey home.

22h41 - Bead of sweat lands on steering wheel.

22h42 - Now completely sober.

22h42 - Flicker right, pull out slowly and carefully.

22h43 - Breathe.